May 19, 2012

acceptable or not

There has been an article posted on facebook and there have been a couple of other people do some blog posts on the subject of bikini wearing....well I have felt the need to do my own.  This article by Carlaane is very informative....I like the point of it, but think it should be aimed at all women not just christians. 

I grew up wear bikinis or a two piece bathing suit because I have a long body and a small chest.  One piece bathing suit didn't fit once I hit puberty(thats when they started to make bathing suits expecting you to have a chest, which I still didn't).  This was also a while ago before the tankini, so no matter what most of my mid-drift was always showing.  I was young and looked a lot different than I do now.  I was a tooth pick.  Skinny and athletic.  I had the type of body that should be in a bikini, but never felt fully comfortable in it, but what choice did I have. 
When I got married or shortly before the tankini came into exisitence.  LOVE THEM.  But I have always had friends and known people that have worn bikinis, and some friends that have even lost wiegh just so that they could look good wearing one.  I always had the attitude that if you felt good wearing it who am I to say that you shouldn't. 
In the last 5 years my opinion has changed drastically.
First is my girl .  I want her to respect her body and to keep it for her future husband.  I see infants, toddlers and young childern wearing bikinis and tops that show more than they have or should show.  It is wrong.  My daughter will not be wearing a bikini as long as she lives in my house. 
Second is my image issues.  I used to look like I should wear a bikini.  I DO NOT anymore and to see other females "flaunt" their big breasts, flat stomach, skinny legs, whether worked for or not, makes me feel fat.  makes me feel like I am not good enough.  I know God has made me perfect.  I know that God has granted me 3 wonderful childern through this body, and that I don't regret and makes me feel proud of every stretch mark.  But that doesn't mean I need to show it off, so why do you need to show off your non stretch marked stomach. 
Third is mens reaction.  I am not visual just like most women, but my husband is like all men, visual.  That is just the way it is.  I don't like when I have to compete with other women for him to look at me.  I know I know this should be his job to keep his eyes on me, but he is not perfect and niether are other men.  Why should we make it harder for them.  If I was comfortable enough to wear a bikini I would be very uncomfortable knowing that I could be a stumbling block to another man other than my husband, and that he could be thinking of me later on(shudder). 
Fourth is my relationship with God.  This is kind of repeating, but He made me perfect and He is the one I live for.  He is the one I do all things for....He comands us not to do anything that can make a brother or sister stumble.  He wants us to focus on him not what that person is thinking of me.  focusing on Him instead of working hard to change my body so that I can look better than that girl in a bikini. Instaed of trying to show people what we have or what we look like why not show them how we love God and how God loves them.  
I love the way this blog puts it Fresh flowers.  I love they way she puts it into words like I have tried, unsuccessfully. 
What we wear matters a lot more than I ever thought.  It does make a difference and we need to remember that. 

1 comment:

Mrs. Wilson said...

I agree with this whole-heartedly. Kaylie used to wear one and I thought it was cute ... until a friend told me her views on kids in bikinis and about creepy men with wandering eyes. She hasn't worn one since and Liliana has never worn one.

I used to wear one. My boyfriend(s) liked it. Now? I wear one with a tank on top. My chest is too big and looks funny in a one-piece and I've never found a tankini I liked.